I have had it! I’m more fed up than I’ve felt in a long time. I have spent long months and many sleepless nights worrying about my unvaccinated staff. The thought that I’d have to fight to recruit new staff amongst a smaller pool of candidates, while every other practice was doing the same thing, left me sleepless and in a cold sweat. Now here I am, months later, and it seems that after some kind of ‘consultation’, all of this will have been for nothing. Of course, we all know that ‘consultation’ really means ‘this is what’s happening; like it or lump it’. I have yet to see a consultation that didn’t produce the expected results.

I feel like my team and I have ridden a roller coaster for the last two years and, as a result, I’ve had no spare time to speak of. I’m incandescent at the idea that my time has been wasted like this. I’m outraged that staff members have felt under such pressure. I feel like this and yet I’m STRONGLY pro-vaccination.

I’ve taken HR advice, attended webinars and sent letters to staff. That’s not to mention all the time I’ve spent with a sobbing and terrified staff member.

We have a lot of staff, and most were vaccinated as soon as it was offered during the pandemic. We’ve all got the odd GP or nurse who says they don’t have the flu jab as the side effects are worse than the flu. But even my usual suspects had their jabs for COVID. I was surprised that one of my colleagues was incredibly hesitant. Indeed, we had a couple who were still unvaccinated at the point where it was becoming a real issue. But for one staff member, this process has felt completely draining, frustrating and sad. A family member of theirs had had a vaccine very early on, and the side effects for this relative were horrific. Side effects like theirs are, of course, incredibly rare, but knowing that doesn’t help. My poor staff member was then caught between a rock and a really hard place. They would have to get over their terror or lose their job.

As the deadline of February 3^rd loomed ever closer, we had more and more fraught conversations. This staff member is a brilliant member of the team, but the guidance made it clear that they needed to be vaccinated to stay working.

GPs tried gentle encouragement and, finally, we got to a position where the staff member was vaccinated. It has been the most exhausting fight of my professional career. I know that there are times in management when I need to just get on and do something, but never have I felt so conflicted about riding roughshod over someone’s legitimate concerns. I’ve never been a ‘my way or the highway’ sort of manager, I’ve always felt that to lead is to bring your team with you on the journey. ‘Vaccine or lose your job’ is not the way I roll and I have lost sleep over this. Nights and nights of sleep! Not to mention the amount of time I’ve spent making sure I’ve followed the right procedures and educated my staff about the consequences of not being vaccinated. And every step of the way, I’ve tried to make sure we didn’t do something wrong that, potentially, could have meant we’d be taken to a tribunal. I KNOW I’m not the only manager in my area who’s had similar experiences, and I bet this picture has been replicated nationwide.

I’m not going to be reimbursed for the hours I’ve wasted, and I get that (even though I could have used the time for something much more productive). What really rankles, though, is this: for every U-turn taken, trust has been eroded. In future, if we’re offering a ‘do this or be sacked’ scenario, my staff will assume that if they’re on the apparent ‘wrong’ side of the discussion, they can just bide their time until the very last minute and a U-turn will save them. In my view, you can only use a threat, if you’re prepared to carry it out. And if you’re not, then you really, really shouldn’t say it.

As I said, I’m beyond frustrated and annoyed, and I know I’m not the only one.